Really Roughing It.

Our grandson Kyle

In the early days of building our camp on Cary Lake, we had to be brave. Well, we didn't HAVE to be brave. Mom invited us to stay at her place next door! But we CHOSE to experience life by making it a bit more difficult to enjoy our modern conveniences. This is a pictorial story of us staying at the camp in sub-freezing weather. That is, two of our grandsons and ourselves.

This is our Lakeside home when it had NO electricity, NO running water, NO interior walls or partitions, NO cooking facilities, NO beds.

Timothy and Kyle went with us in November night of 2011 to help work on this family project and I am sure they have some memories of how things were. And now YOU can get an idea!

Wayne with an air mattress

We had a chair that Brian gave us, so that was one comfort of home away from home! We had a battery operated light, so with that light on, we prepare for a cold one. We had lots of warm bedding, a sleeping bag borrowed from Jonathan, and some air mattresses to protect our bones and muscles and keep us ready to work the next day.

With no cooking facilities, we ate cookies before bed time! And the falling temperatures forced us into our cocoons ASAP!! We knew that if things became too difficult, we could always vacate our place and use Mom's couch and spare beds. But we DID IT!  The first sound I heard next morning was our door closing quietly. I looked out the window to see two boys heading to Gram's. I think they weren't about to use the alternative bathroom facilities!

Kyle fell asleep quickly and Timothy kept WARM! 

It was definitely an adventure and we had fun. 

Snow! Really?

A little earlier today I saw a photo that one of my friends in Monticello shared on the internet. It was big, beautiful flakes and I think the kind that drift lazily to the ground and wait for their companions to join them in making the landscape a fluffy, white wonderland.

Oh, when we were children, the glimpse of that first snowfall was so welcome, so exciting! We loved to play in the snow, making snowballs, snow forts, snowmen, snow tunnels. To us, the more snow, the better. We even loved to take our little shovels outside and help clear a path to the doors and clean up the driveway. Here you see Jim plowing out his and Mom's yard back in the early 60's.

Oh, yes! Snow is something that can entertain children for many delightful hours in the winter time. We loved the great outdoors, anyway. Every season had its joyous adventures. In the spring and summer it was the wind and flying kites. And it was watching birds build their nests and following the cattle around the pasture. It was smelling the apple blossoms and watching for the strawberries to ripen. It was "Hide and Seek." It was "Cops and Robbers". It was playing "Tag". Our fun was only limited by our imaginations and the weather. We couldn't play outside in a thunder storm. But there is absolutely nothing like putting on your swim suit and running outside to play in the mud puddles. (After all, the driveways weren't paved back then! In the fall it was potato harvest, autumn leaves, carving pumpkins!

But back to the topic: Snow. The photo you see here was from the late 40's. Left to right are cousins Andrea, Lory, and me. We are on our grandfather's snow scoop and we found it delightful when he or another adult pushed us around the yard once the work was done! The two dogs, I think, felt a lot of responsibility for us. "Puppy" on the left was Andrea's and Lory's dog. And "Brownie" belonged to our grandparents.

I am not sure when it happened, but over time I lost my adoration for snow and winter time. Oh, I still love the changing seasons but for me a month or less of snowy weather would be fine! We used to go outside in the snow with our children and grandchildren but to be honest, I would rather watch out the windows and take photos to save the memories!

Here, through a window, is a photo of Isaac, taken about 65 years later on our back deck! He wanted to help his great grampie shovel the snow. He loved every minute of it! Things are so different in some ways, but so unchanged in others. The snow, the child, the shovel, the dog! There is a sweetness to it.

In thinking on these things, I am reminded of the Scripture in Genesis 8:22. ""While the earth remains, Seedtime and harvest, And cold and heat, And summer and winter, And day and night Shall not cease."
These changing seasons are evidence that the Lord is faithful! They are blessings from HIM. Thank you, Lord! 

We Love Gardening!

Written For Our Grandchildren --

Gardening has always been important to us. When your parents were young, we had two big gardens. One was east of our house and the other was on the west. And we had some great adventures from turning the soil in the spring to harvesting in the fall.

In the early days, Gramp used to come home from work almost every day for lunch. Day after day, he would go to the garden before he ate to see how the garden was going. And he would always announce to me what he saw. "The beans have sprouted".  "The squash is blossomed". "We will need to pick the peas." He simply loved it.

One year our corn was growing beautifully! It was tall and green and just about ready to harvest. I looked out the window just to admire it one day only to see that the neighbor's cows were having a gourmet meal in our corn patch -- twelve rows of it! I went out the door with a broom in my hand and headed to the garden, yelling at those four or five Holsteins. They knew I meant business and they ran in every direction knocking our corn down in the process. The promise of corn on the cob dwindled dramatically in only a few moments of time. Our neighbor was so sorrowful over what happened that he brought us two sacks of peas from HIS garden.



Every fall we were able to can and freeze large quantities of vegetables for our family to enjoy until the next harvest time. Our children -- your Moms and Dads -- were always very helpful in planting and gathering! And they also enjoyed helping themselves. It was common to see our children pulling carrots to eat fresh, shelling peas for a snack, picking and apple or berries, or eating a ripe tomato.
It was just part of the joy of gardening!

Growing fruits and vegetables has, indeed, been a tradition for us. That and apple picking at nearby orchards after we moved to Glenburn. I remember the times that we took some of our grandchildren and their parents to the orchards nearby. It was something that we really loved to do. This year we went by ourselves. But we did pick enough to share!

This spring I thought Gramp shouldn't plant anything. He has the aches and pains of age and I am not able to do much to help him. But he said he wanted to plant a few things. So he planted a row of green beans, a row of beets, about a dozen summer squash (zucchini and yellow crookneck), and around a dozen tomato plants. He planted some cucumbers, too, but they didn't survive.

What a tomato harvest we had! And because the frost was delayed for about a month, the plants continued to produce until nearly the middle of October. We blanched and peeled quarts and quarts of whole tomatoes for the freezer. We cooked tomatoes with summer squash, onions and peppers to freeze and we had more than 30 packages of those.

We made ketchup, tomato soup, and spaghetti sauce. We also froze some beets and made pickled beets -- a favorite. We have also been working on apple sauce. Are we ever stocked for the winter!
Not only are we well stocked, but we had some to share with others. By the way, half of the fun of gardening is to share!

And what about next year? Well, I am thinking already that it would be fun to have a few things to eat fresh. We will see.

The growing season is evidence of our Lord's faithfulness to us and His provision for us.
The Bible says, "While the earth remains, Seedtime and harvest, And cold and heat, And summer and winter, And day and night Shall not cease." - Genesis 8:22

A Lesson From The Great Depression

I am a child of parents who lived through the Great Depression, a time of serious financial struggles for many after a Stock Market Crash that devastated the economy.

My mother has told me stories of how she and her brother Lawrence shared a pencil at school. They stopped at a little store on their walk to school and spent a penny on a pencil. The idea was for the pencil to last for a week. My Uncle Lawrence would cut the pencil in half to share with his sister. One of them kept the end with the eraser and the other used the end with no eraser.  The prior week's stub with the left-over eraser was used by the one who had no eraser on a given week.

Lunches for school were carried in lard cans that had a bail on them. Most frequently lunch was a serving of baked beans packed with a homemade biscuit on top. Fruit was rare. In fact Mom said that a highlight at Christmas time was an orange in the toe of her stocking. It was usually the only orange that she had for the year.

One standard was that NOTHING was wasted! Let me tell you about a treasure that I have from those days:

A few years ago, my cousin Andrea told me that she had a little stack of quilt squares that our grandmother had given her for making a quilt. She had forgotten about them, but had found them in a drawer with other fabrics. She wanted to know if I would like it if she made up the quilt and gave it to us to have at our camp (under construction). And I told her I would love it.

Grammie had made the squares from cotton sugar sacks and from scraps of material that she had saved. Often she saved good parts from worn clothing -- like the backs of shirts. And she reused them in making quilts or other useful items.

Andrea is a great seamstress and she went to work, using those wonderful pieces from 70 years ago -- or more.  When she was finished, she gave it to me and I was astounded! What a beautiful quilt! How precious to look at it and touch the squares that my grandmother had held in her hand.

Each square has a "Sunbonnet Sue" appliqued on it by hand-stitching -- Grammie's hand. Some of the squares still have the printed "Revere Sugar" on them! But to look at it again and think of how Grammie's thread, needle, scissors, and thimble were used to turn something common into something beautiful really touched me! Parts of each one had some hand embroidery, as well. And Grammie, by the way, taught ME to embroider when I was small. What good memories!

The quilt has been stored at our house during the construction of our camp / cottage. But this week we took it there. And we spread it on Mom's bed so we could get a picture to show her.

When I showed it to Mom today, she said, "What's that?" Then she caught her breath and said, "Oooooh!" She was so thrilled to see it.

So, thank you, Andrea! Your labor of love cannot even be described. . . it is beyond
wonderful!

They Were Going To Be Famous!

Grampie Wayne spent some of his growing up years in the coal and corn land of rural Illinois, near the Kankakee River. His Dad was pastor at Custer Park Baptist Church, where his grandmother had been a member several years prior.

Now, according to him, Custer Park was a "one horse town and the horse was dead." You can't imagine the road back in the 1950s. The road had a paved lane in the center and a wide shoulder of gravel on each side of the pavement. Drivers would stay on the paved lane until they met another vehicle and then they would pull over with one tire on the pavement and one on the gravel. He says that was really scary for kids.

The Wabash Rail Road ran through town and the mail sack was grabbed on the way through, by a train crewman, who snatched it from the pole where it was left hanging. We cannot imagine that today, but -- from Pony Express days until now, the mail had to get through! And it did.

There were two grocery stores in town. The main store was Aldrich's and the other was Case's. Case's didn't operate very long, as he remembers. Between the two stores was a low building that housed the post office. He remembers getting baby chicks through the mail and at the post office, that annual delivery day found the building full of chirping!

Next to the post office was a hotel, he thinks. And for some cause, unknown to him it burned to the ground. That really changed the mini-skyline and as far as he knows the hotel was never rebuilt.

The Church was nearby and the cemetary. You can visit that cemetary these days and see a headstone at the grave is his great grandparents, Frank and Martha. The Church has a new building outside of the little town center.

Near the graveyard his friend, Jimmy lived and it was a short hoof for the boys when they visited. Gramp tells of many adventures. And they were typical boys from the time when there was no TV, no internet, no digital games and all that is available today. Most of the play time was outside.

One day a few boys, including his friends Gary and Jimmy were playing in a nearby corn field. As they went between the rows, kicking at the wonderful, black soil they found a BONE. It was big and it needed to be dug up. A DINOSAUER BONE! They had to dig it up and report their find to the Chicago Museum of Science. They were going to be famous. And they were going to be wealthy.
So they dug and dug with their hearts beating faster and faster (I presume). AMAZING! They had an area, probably 9 x 11 feet dug up in the field and probably as much as 6 feet deep. Whatever the size, he remembers it as pretty massive.

Everything was fine with the young scientists until someone driving past the research site stopped the car and screamed at them. They took off running -- all in different directions! Gramp said he ran into the electric fence but he was so scared he didn't know if he got a shock or not. Maybe it was off at the time.

It was so humiliating to Gramp! Not only did they find that their archeological dig was unappreciated, but their dreams were shattered when they found out the skeleton was that of a horse! (Maybe it was that one horse from the one-horse town.)

But one of the boys kept the dream alive by keeping a "dinosaur tooth" in his collection at home. Gramp doesn't know where he got that specimen, but likely from another adventure at a different time or place. From time to time he would take the tooth to school and show it. Your Gramp thinks it was a rock!


Note: The photo of Grampie was taken about a half century later very close to the original scene.

Words -- Peace or Pain?

A friend wrote a message today about verbal and emotional abuse. She wants people to realize these kinds of mistreatment are as harmful as physical abuse or battering. And she is right. In fact, cruel and hate-filled words may be even MORE painful than a slap, a kick, or a punch.

Unfortunately, verbal and emotional abuse are not rare. Many of us remember the child on the playground who was always chosen last to be on a team. Perhaps we ourselves have been victims of mockery and name-calling.

All around us there are people who carry insecurities, anger, and sorrowful memories because they have been targets of someone else's mockery or wrath. Perhaps we are casualties of verbal emotional, or some other form of abuse. Some may heal to an extent, but many will bear the scars of emotional trauma all the rest of their lives.

In our culture, in our families, at school, on the job, and even in our Churches hurtful things are said to one degree or another. This is counter to what God has commanded us when He said to love our neighbor as ourselves. By our words, we can bring peace and joy to others (and to ourselves). And we can bless someone else. Conversely, our words can bring pain and sorrow. It is hard to think of it, but we can be perpetrators of abuse.

The Bible is clear that our words -- and even our thoughts -- are of great importance.  James wrote, "With [the tongue] we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God.  From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so." It is Jesus who said that people will know that we are His followers if we have love for one another! 

There is a little song that we used to sing in Sunday School when I was a child and we taught it to our children. It goes like this:

"Oh, be careful, little tongue what you say!
Be careful little tongue what you say.
For the Father up above
Is looking down in LOVE,
So be careful, little tongue what you say."

Let's join with the Psalmist, who prayed:

"Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
be acceptable in your sight, O LORD, my rock and my redeemer."  Psalm 19:14

Being The Eldest Sibling

Here is another memory, family! This photo is from 1967 when Valerie was about 2 1/2 and Stephen was almost a year old. When I think back on those days I think of how she took it upon herself to care for her little siblings. It was so sweet.

That is what the eldest child so often does! They are the helpers and the care-givers of the family. As the older sister in my family, I waited 5 1/2 years for a sibling. And, oh what a happy day to have my one, dear sister come into ou...r family. She was so much fun and so sweet.

By the time I was almost nine, there were four of us -- two brothers were welcomed into our family. And I was the baby sitter since Mom was sick with phlebitis in her legs quite frequently in those days.

I felt responsible for her and for my siblings. It wasn't easy. I thought at times that Mom expected more than I was able to give. The kids gave me a tough time sometimes. But God enabled me to do what He called me to do. And I still thank Him!

The care-giver older sister role became more intensified when Mom was widowed at the age of 34. Those were very tough times, but there were so many lessons to be learned and I am grateful that now I can hold a hand here and there and honestly say, "I understand. I care".


The Bible tells us this in 2 Corinthians chapter 1:

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.

"For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also abounds through Christ. Now if we are afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation, which is effective for enduring the same sufferings which we also suffer.

"Or if we are comforted, it is for your consolation and salvation. And our hope for you is steadfast, because we know that as you are partakers of the sufferings, so also you will partake of the consolation."

So, dear ones, trust the Lord in the good times and in the tough times. Through all the joys, all the sorrows, all the rewards, and all the injustices the Lord will walk with you. And He will form you into a more loving and compassionate person. May He be glorified through it all.

More Family Memories - Part 1

Did you ever think: "I should write that down so I don't forget it."
We all have, but if you are like I am, you get busy and forget.
So I've decided to dive into the past and pull out some cute and special things mainly for family, but you friends are welcome to join us if you wish. :
...

So let's start right here with a note that Bethany wrote to Valerie in the fall of her freshman year in college! Now, how sweet is that?

Love in the family is more precious than gold! If you, dear reader, have a story from the family that you would like to share, please send it to me. I will pass it along in this blog so that we can have it available for those who love the good, old stories. Then some day when a cherished, little face looks into yours and asks for a story about the "olden days", you will have a resource right here!                                                                            

Have Confidence. God is in Control!

We have often wondered at how people can grow up in the same environment yet be so different. Personality, gifts, talents, interests, academics, physical appearance, and other features and attributes can be so varied -- even among siblings and cousins.

God made each one special and unique. And He is interested in everything about us. See what the Bible has to say: in Psalm 139:

". . .you formed my inward parts;
    you knitted me together in my mother's womb.¹⁴ I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
    my soul knows it very well.¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
    intricately woven in the depths of the earth.¹⁶ Your eyes saw my unformed substance;in your book were written, every one of them,
    the days that were formed for me,    when as yet there was none of them."

Our God knows ALL things, even before they happen. And He knew us  before we were even conceived. What an awesome thought.

Is there any wonder that the ONE who formed us, made us, and loves us is interested in every aspect of our lives? That, my friends should give us peace and confidence. 

Sometimes we think of a child, grandchild, or other loved one or friend and we become worried about his or her well-being. And we have to remind ourselves that GOD loves them more than we do. And we can trust Him to work in their lives.

Romans 8:32 comes to mind.  "He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?"

Cling to this thought with confidence that our Lord is in control and He loves us "with an everlasting love": 

 

Thoughts On Aging

These are thoughts that I was having on September 10, 2002 --

Tonight I am thinking of the aged and the aging.

We know that we are to honor, to value, to respect, and to emulate our elders -- especially the dear Christians who have given so much love, time, prayers, money and of themselves to and for us.

But we also have to admit that we become confused, frustrated, hurt, and angry sometimes because we don't know how to properly care for them and we don't understand their concerns and their fears.

Someone said today of a loved one, "he is no longer living the life of faith that we were always used to seeing." And we knew exactly what this friend meant, for we saw Wayne's Dad become more preoccupied with the security (financially) that he could provide in the workplace vs the ministry. It was a great disappointment to us when he left the pastorate.

Of course, he never lost his love for the Lord, His Word, and His Church. But we couldn't help but feel that he settled for second best in areas of his life (and we have, too).

May God grant us patience and an extra measure of love and understanding for our elderly loved ones. And may we remember we will "be there" before we know it!

Addenda added on September 1, 2017:

Fifteen years have passed since I wrote those words. And, we are "there" ourselves. We have watched ourselves losing abilities that we took for granted. We are more fragile physically. We don't move about as quickly as we once did. Every task takes more time and energy than ever. We forget things and have to retrace our steps more often than we once did.

We find ourselves thinking more and more about the changes that may come into our lives very quickly. When one of us dies, what kinds of decisions will the other have to make? We talk about it and are pondering some possible changes even now.

But . . . "we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day.  For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison,  as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal."  -- 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Prayer Is Vital

Doing The Best Thing and The Least Thing We Can Do
January 27, 2012

Grandchildren, here is a picture of some of you in our family room, but I am thinking of every one of you from the very youngest (Adam) to the oldest (Heather). There are 26 of you as of 2012.

Let's talk about prayer today. Prayer -- it's simply talking to God. He is with us always and has His ears open to us. He knows our happy times and he knows our sad times. And He is always ready to listen.

I learned to pray as a very young child. Our family was a praying family. But your grandfather taught me more about prayer after we were married. One thing that amazed me about Grampie was that he prayed about everything. For example, when we got into the car to go somewhere, we prayed before we started our trip and asked God to give us "traveling mercies" -- to keep us safe. He prayed for our children before they were born. And he prayed for the children that our children would have someday (that is YOU, of course).  He prayed when he couldn't find something. Your Grampie prayed about things that never entered my head as a matter for prayer. He helped me to understand more fully that GOD cares about every detail of our lives, whether it is big or little.

One night I was reading the Bible online. Online Bible reading is great because it is easy to go from translation to translation and to paraphrases in order to get a better understanding of the chapters and the verses. While I was reading, an old spiritual came to mind: "It's me, it's me, Oh Lord, standing in the need of prayer. . . not my brother, not my sister, but it's me, Oh Lord." Hmmm -- that made me stop and think. I pray for you and a lot of people, but how often do I really pray for ME?

I'm supposed to pray for YOU. The Bible commands it! In the Old Testament, the Prophet Samuel said to King Saul, "God forbid that I should sin by ceasing to pray for you." In this very difficult world, the very best thing that we can do for one another is to pray! And we can do that any time of the day or night. We can pray lying on our beds, driving the car, at work, at play. We can pray anywhere and at any time. We can speak aloud or direct our thoughts to the Lord because He knows what we are thinking on the inside.

There are always many needs among our family, friends, and "friends of friends": spiritual, physical, emotional, material, end-of life issues, pregnancies, stresses, and conflicts. People are concerned about their grades, where they will go to college, who they will marry. Some of those things are overwhelming to us and they motivate us to pray for each other. Those are the times when we go to God's Emergency Room!

But we should pray for ourselves, too. When we do that, we are telling our VERY best friend about us! One thing to remember is that we should be very careful that we do not ONLY pray when we have problems. The Bible says we should "pray without ceasing". That doesn't mean we have to be praying every second, but we must not neglect our regular times to pray -- daily. You know when we pray for you most often? It is at meal times when we thank the Lord for our food. So three or more times every day we are praying for members of our family. Sometimes we pray because we know you have a need. And other times pray for you "just because".

What do you pray about? If you are like me, maybe you forget to ask the Lord to teach you what you need to know for living this life in a pure and wholesome way. Maybe you forget to tell Him when you have had bad thoughts or when you have been mean or when you have used rude or crude language. He wants to hear from us at those times and He has promised to forgive us and to help us please Him in everything we do and in everything we say. If we just go our own way, we usually live very selfish lives. We need God's guidance and so we pray and we read the Bible. We go to Church and we talk to other Christians and to our family. That is how we learn. And that is how we grow as Christians.

Maybe the thing we forget most often is to praise Him for who He is -- our Lord and Savior. Or maybe we are more forgetful about thanking Him for the blessings and miracles that He freely gives to us by His grace -- especially the miracles of salvation and redemption.

So remember to pray for friends and family. And remember to pray for yourself, too. When you pray, tell God how wonderful He is. Tell Him you love Him. Thank God for His goodness and His gracious gifts. Tell the Lord when you have done wrong things. Tell Him you are sorry and that You want to not do that again. That is repenting -- turning away from those things that do not please the Lord. So pray. It is the LEAST you can do and it is the BEST you can do.

Getting Ready For A Camp

One Of Those Special Moments
February 1, 2012

It really was a very special time for your Grandfather, Uncle Jonathan, Uncle Brian, and me.  We had worked hard clearing up brush and unwanted logs at our site on Cary Lake. It was the fall of 2011 -- late October. It was well into the evening.  The moon was full, the air was calm. Except for the crackling of the fire and the soft tone of our voices, there was little else to hear as we enjoyed the unusually warm night and the fires. We had four of them burning that night. 

It was a night for thinking about the value of family and time together with people that we love. It was a time to be enveloped in the peace of a perfect night. We cherish such times.  

The light from those fires remind me that Jesus said we are to be as lights in this very dark world. One time we were in Luray Cavern in Virginia and as the guide showed us the amazing formations, we came to a large space and he stopped us. He said he was going to have the lights turned off so we could experience total darkness. The lights went off and there was no glimmer anywhere. The darkness was almost palpable. I moved my hand in front of my face but could see nothing. It was total blindness and it seemed to even be a little hard to catch my breath in such dark and "heavy" air. Then after a moment he said he was going to strike a match so we could see how effective a little light was in a totally dark place. It was amazing. I could see features from a few yards away. We all began to murmur over it because we were so astonished.

I tell you this to remind you that Jesus said we are not to hide our light, but to let it shine. If you are ever tempted to think that your good deeds, your kind words, your prayers are of no value, think again! Those things stand out brightly in this troubled world. People all around you are hurting and they need to know that somebody cares. Maybe you can't fix their problems, but you CAN care. As someone wrote on facebook recently, "one person can make a difference -- or at least try." How true!

Jonathan Was Well Received

When Jonathan Joined our Circle
Written 2-12-2012

To Grand Manan and Back

Adventure On A Ferry 
February 12, 2012

Some of our Great Kids

Random Photos From Maine
February 12, 2012

These are just random pictures of some of the very precious children that God has added to our family. How we thank Him for each and every one -- oldest to youngest (and their parents, too).

Our Precious Ones

The Grass In Spring -- A Delightful Thing

February 12, 2012

Are You Thinking of Marriage?

To our beloved Grandchildren --
February 12, 2012

On August 27, 2013 -- if Gramp and I live that long -- we will celebrate fifty years of marriage. I am writing this because we live in a culture where about half of the marriages end up in divorce.  That is so sad because we know that marriage is meant to be between a man and a woman for life -- that was God's plan and it is still His plan. But people really mess things up and I don't know all the reasons for marriages not lasting "til death parts you".

One of the things that people do wrong is that they don't have a realistic view of marriage to start with! Marriage is not a continual romantic trip. A GOOD marriage is a result of VERY hard work. It is a result of people understanding that THEY are not the center of the universe. In marriage you love, you share, you forgive, you set good goals, and most of all you invite someone else into your relationship -- that someone else is the LORD. It really takes ALL THREE (not just one) persons to be committed to what is good and right -- you, your spouse, and the Lord.

When I was a teenager someone very wise told me: "you cannot help who you fall in love with." But you CAN HELP who you spend time with. And while you aren't always on an active HUNT to find a husband or wife, you can rule out certain types as friends of the opposite sex. The red flags should go up when another person who:

1. Is not a Christian (a true believer in the Lord Jesus) or is a Christian who does not put the Lord and His will ahead of himself or herself;
2. Always wants his or her own way;
3. Never or rarely puts YOU first;
4. Makes fun of you, calls you names, or makes you feel threatened or belittled;
5. Does not treat your parents courteously or talks about them critically or with contempt (after all, they are why YOU are here in the first place).
Even with all of THAT, if there is a perfect way to be sure, I cannot describe it. Why? people are sinners and they can "turn every one to their own way..."

For me, one of the most important things was to know that my MOM approved of the guy that I would marry -- so something interesting happened when Grampie asked me to marry him. Read on:

Hopes, Dreams, and Prayers

Growing Old With No Children Is Lonely!
February 13, 2012

When I was a young mother, I worked at the old Lincoln Hospital for a week while the hospital administrator / medical technologist (one and only) went on the first vacation he had taken in many years. Grammie Ruth kept Valerie and Stephen and your Grampie worked in Machias that week.

There wasn't much lab work to do in that tiny hospital with a nursing home wing. So when I finished my lab work for the day I went to the nursing home to do some volunteer work as companion to patients who had no visitors. One woman was around ninety. She had never married and had no children. She was sad and lonely. I combed her hair and talked to her and she loved the attention. She showed me a picture of herself and three other people. They had come to see her, but she didn't know who they were.

The nurses told me they wanted a picture and had never been there before or since. Sad!

Our family has been SO blessed with children -- beautiful children! We are thankful for every one of you. We believe that YOU are God's gifts to us. And we hope to never be lonely in our old age. This is Samuel Buza giving his Mom a kiss. The love of a child is precious beyond words. And this boy KNOWS he is loved and cherished by his parents.

The Bible tells us to bring our children up in the "nurture and admonition of the Lord".  It also says that if we train a child in the way he should go that when he is old, he will not depart from it. We are thankful that our sons and daughters are parents who share their faith and the love of God with our grandchildren. Here Jonathan is teaching Robert -- a boy who loves to learn from his parents.

The song goes, "How sweet to hold a newborn baby. .

." And it is!  Each and every one is precious --

and special in some wonderful way. Kyle is quiet,

but very tender hearted. He never forgets to

give us a "hello hug" when we see him.

When he was in elementary school,

he wrote a paper about his future and at that time 

he thought he ought to be a missionary to New York

or some other place (I forgot which state it was).

What I do hope is that no matter WHERE he and

his siblings and cousins go they will remember

to tell others about the God who loves them!

What a blessing to think about grandchildren

becoming men and women of God.

 

Ninety!

A Stellar Day For My Mom

Today -- February 19, 2012 is my mother's 90th birthday. She was born on a Sunday, she said -- a beautiful, sunny day.

The day she was born was much like today, weather-wise. But the world is a vastly different place than it was almost a century ago.

When she was very young, much of the travel was still done by horse and wagon or horse and sleigh. But the Model T Ford was available from the time her Dad was a young teenager.

My grandparents used a kerosene lamp to light the home at night. Wood was used for heat and cooking. There was no indoor plumbing. Their farming was done with a pair of horses, Rowdy and Chub.  Families in Aroostook County were pretty self sufficient except for a few staples that were purchased twice a year, or so: flour, molasses, sugar, salt, and such. Lard was sometimes purchased to use as shortening, but sometimes even that was made at home.

Yesterday Mom was truly the life of the party at our house in Glenburn. Before the day was over, 30 family members had attended the open house in her honor. She enjoyed the food, the gifts, the cards, the cake, the singing of "Happy Birthday" (and she even directed the choir). But most of all she enjoyed the people. At one point she told us that she was in her second childhood. "Now that I am ninety, I can do whatever I want to and get away with it", she said. Then she modified that declaration by saying that when she was young she had to listen to her parents but now she has to listen to her kids.

Today she told me she loves being 90 because she is feeling better than in a long time. And she is looking so WELL. She was in the hospital for a week before the party day and we thought she would be very weary after the festivities, but she had a ball. Usually after a busy day, she is exhausted. But not this time! I think some of her newly found stamina is directly related to the iron therapy she had in the hospital. But I think part of it was from the joy she felt, just being with the family that she loves -- having so many of us together.

You can see pictures of Mom and some tidbits of her life at a site I am working on:  http://imageevent.com/bbuza/familypictures/mymom .  This is a work in progress, so you might want to check it from time to time and look at the other images I have there so far if you would like.

In July I will be 69. What an amazing thing to still have my Mom at this age. I thank the Lord for that blessing, and hope to not take it for granted. She told me today that she will still be here to celebrate our 50th wedding anniversary in August of 2013. I believe her.

February 20th: Grammie Ruth just told me that you should know that Grampie Ellery had the first truck in Littleton. It was a Model T.  He bought the "innards", seat and steering wheel and built it into a truck. He crafted a wooden cab and body. Other than a windshield, it had no windows. Mom remembers that she and Uncle Lawrence would sit on old car seats on the back of the truck and ride to Bangor.

Because there were no sideboards on the body of the truck,  Mom and her brother sat with their backs against the driver's seat and passenger seat. Aunt Iola sat on Grammie Muriel's lap. The trip took many hours, she said. I personally remember that Gramp's driving speed was 35 mph, whether it was posted 25 or 45! His concept of a left turn was to angle across the pavement from several yards away (I was horrified).

Wealthy!

Our Christian Roots

This blog will mostly talk about the Cains and Nasons. Here is more of what my mother shared with me on February 20, 2012:

My mother's grandfather George Wilmot (Bill) Nason and my grandfather Clifford Burpee Cain were best of friends. Both lived in Monticello, Maine in the early years of the 20th Century. Bill was a farmer and woodsman. Cliff was a minister of the Gospel. Both were Christians.

We are a wealthy family. Yes, we are rich -- not in the world's goods -- but we have an heritage that is bountiful. Its scope is beyond our ability to describe. Our Christian roots grow deep.

                                                              We don't know when our

Christian roots were first planted. There is evidence in our history to support the idea that the DeGrasse ancestors in the Nason line were French Hugenots -- saints of the Lord Jesus Christ. True or not, we are sure of one thing: those of us who have been adopted into the family of God were chosen in Christ before the foundation of the world. He knew us before the world began. Our roots grow deep -- from before the beginning of time. What can we say about such grace, such love! We are inadequate to understand our Christian roots, and we are unable to thank Him enough for we are "unworthy of the LEAST of His favor".

Mom said that Grammie Muriel told of her father (Bill) that when he became a Christian he immediately began to have family devotions in the home. He gathered his wife Jessie (Murphy) and his ten children in a circle and began to read to them, starting in the Book of Revelation. Grammie Muriel said her little siblings were frightened at some of the things being read to them. We wonder why -- instead of starting with creation or the life of Christ -- he began his family readings in what may be the most difficult book in the Bible to understand. But we appreciate so very much his resolve to share the Word with his family. What an example to emulate!
Cliff Cain studied at Providence Bible Institute in Rhode Island. This school was later known as Providence Barrington Bible College and finally as Barrington College. When the college closed its doors in the 1980s, its extensive collection of Bibles was donated to the library at Pensacola Christian College, where Valerie and Kevin earned their degrees. Grampie Clifford was ordained to the ministry in 1917 at the West Road Primitive Baptist Church (interior is pictured above) and in 1918 when my father was only 2 years old, he died of tuberculosis of the spine.

Much of the friendship between Bill and Cliff centered around fellowship and ministry at the Lake Road Church, a sister Church to the West Road. West Road was the home Church of Clifford and Catherine (Grammie Kitt Miller) Cain. Lake Road was the home Church of the Nason clan: Bill's family and his father David's family. It was also the home Church of the Andrew Murphy family -- Grammie Jessie's family. The congregations met together for quarterly meetings with other Primitive Baptist Churches in New Brunswick. Those were great times of fellowship.

The Nason family, the Murphy family, and other neighbors on and near the Lake Road met in the school house for several years. But it was a mission in the hearts of our forebears to have a Church meeting house of their own. Bill and David cut wood and Bill milled it for constructing the building, which was completed around the year 1916. My mother's great grandfather David purchased the steeple bell (which Grampie Wayne and I rang at our wedding). Mom believes that her great grandfather lived to be 90 years old and after his funeral the bell was tolled once for every year of his life. She said people in Monticello village, a few miles away claimed that they could hear the bell. Grammie Jessie (Murphy) Nason's dad purchased the beautiful pulpit, which is still in use today. Jessie sewed the first pulpit curtains that hung between the pulpit and posts on either side of it. Grammie Muriel, just a teenage, walked all over Monticello soliciting gifts to pay for the reed organ. I remember my mother playing that organ when I was young. Brother Clifford would sit on her lap with is little hands on the backs of her hands and "help" her play for the services. This is the organ that I started playing for Church services when I was only ten. A child had to work very hard to pump the old organ in order to get a smooth flow of music from it. It was hard work, but the music was beautiful.

It must have been a time of great rejoicing when the Church was opened for Sunday School and worship. Circuit riding ministers from New Brunswick traveled to Lake Road to preach, as did Clifford Cain and another preacher Hartt from Monticello. When there was no guest minister, Bill Nason would take his Bible and mount the steps to the pulpit. There he would read to the people. He was poorly educated and unable to read very well. Whenever he stumbled over a word someone in the congregation would prompt him. As he read the Word and taught the people, Bill Nason became a proficient reader.

Mom wishes she knew more about our Grandfather Clifford -- my Dad's father. The most precious treasure we have from him is the fact that he set aside one night of every week to pray for the generations that would follow him. We believe that we see answers to his prayers in our own lives and in the lives of all his descendents who have trusted in Christ as Savior over the years.

As I said before, God called him home at the age of 42. Known as a man of prayer even by people I met during my teen years, he left us an example for us to follow. We also must be people of prayer! Grammie Kitt was with him when he died. She said that as he lay dying, she heard a voice, "Clifford, are you coming?" He raised his hand, answered in the affirmative and passed into the presence of Jesus, which is "far better".

I knew Grampie Bill. We had his kitchen table in our kitchen when I was growing up. I liked him a lot. He died of cancer when I was a child and I remember when the call came from Bangor telling my grandmother of his passing. Of course, I never knew Grampie Cliff. I look forward to meeting him. I look forward to thanking him for praying for ME, for my husband, for my children, and for so many others.

As I said, we are very wealthy people!

Note: pictured in the pews nearest are Bethany and Christopher Sykes with Kyle and Timothy Harmon. Behind them you can see me (Brenda) and Wayne Buza. In the next row is Zachary Cain (the second Clifford's son).

 

A Walk With Jesus

I'll Go Where You Want Me to Go, Dear Lord
February 20, 2012

Maybe you have heard me say, "all of this is temporary."  That means that this world and all it has to offer will be gone someday. It means that whether we live to be 40 (as my Dad did) or if you live to be 90 and beyond as my mother is, please be sure that you spend those years, that energy, the life that God has given you in ways that will make a difference for the better.

So many times I have thought -- and said -- wouldn't it be wonderful if our children could learn from what we have experienced and seen in this life? Wouldn't it be wonderful if they would decide to listen to us, take our advice, and have a happier life journey?

Grandchildren, I am writing this blog to you because I want you to consider the value of living a life that is pure and devoted to the Lord. Someone has said "only one life, 'twill soon be past; only what's done for Christ will last."

Let me place before you the story of my mother and her spiritual journey. Certainly, I cannot see her heart and tell you all that is there. But I can do this: I can tell you what she has said to me and I can tell you what I have seen in her. Is she perfect? NO. Have I ever been disappointed in her? YES. Am I sorry she is my mother? NO. Has she been a good example for me to follow? YES.

My mother -- Ruth Geraldine Watson (pictured above at the age of 13) cannot remember a time when she did not hear about the Lord Jesus and about His love for her. Her mother taught her Bible verses and songs (in an off key voice) about our Lord and God. She told me today that she first remembers going to Church when she was only four. She walked about a mile to the Littleton United Baptist Church and attended Junior Church, taught by Lily Shaw -- a very dear friend of Grammie Muriel.

It was in Junior Church as she heard continually of the love of God that her little heart first trusted in Christ. She always loved going to Church and even when children were sick at home she walked and very rarely missed a Sunday. She said that when she was nine years old the pastor spoke to her about what it means to be a Christian and she knew she wanted to be baptized.

Her baptism was at Cary Lake (and that is where I was baptized, also at the age of nine). She said she will never forget that day. As she came out of the water the Christians gathered on the shore were singing, "I’ll go where You want me to go, dear Lord, O’er mountain, or plain, or sea; I’ll say what You want me to say, dear Lord,
I’ll be what You want me to be." She said those words are burned into her heart even to this day. She took them seriously and lived her life by them.

By the time she was in high school, my mother was teaching a Sunday School class. At her Church she became active in a youth group called "Christian Endeavor" (CE) and became the president. She attended CE conferences at the state level and was a speaker at some of the meetings. In high school at Ricker Classical Institute in Houlton she was involved in Christian organizations. When she graduated with an honor part the topic of her speech was "Keeping Religion in America". At Ricker Junior College she continued in her Christian groups and activities.

She began to date my father, Paul Cain.  His sisters and brothers-in-law were active with the Primitive Baptist denomination and the young couple began to attend quarterly meetings of the denomination. At that point the Lake Road Church had been closed for awhile, but after my parents married they participated with other family members in the reopening of the Church for worship. Mom became the first adult Sunday School teacher and became the Church clerk, a position which she held for over sixty years. She did service as the Church organist for awhile and over the years she has served on several boards and committees.

My mother was involved in youth ministry, especially after she was widowed at the age of 34. She taught a boys' Sunday School class, planned and directed VBS, directed camps at the Saint John Valley Bible Camp, and held a number of different leadership roles in the Youth Temperence Council, Word of Life club and AWANA club. She developed and taught the Junior Church program for a number of years.

Mom was involved in women's ministries, too: the Church ladies' aide, women's fellowship,  and the Women's Christian Temperance Union. One thing I saw her do was make fruit and baked goods to distribute to the elderly at Christmas. That tradition continued until some of the "elderly" were younger than she!

When I was a teenager the doors of our home were always open to my friends. Some of us had a great time playing our musical instruments in the living room, playing board games, making popcorn, and just "hanging out". 

She was involved in Brownies and Girl Scouts, ensured that we had piano lessons, burned the midnight oil with me when I was working on essays for English class, and many other things to enrich and benefit our lives. One thing I will never forget is the beautiful dress that she made for me to wear to a Christmas concert by my high school glee club. It was bright read taffeta with nylon netting. I felt so "fancy" and so loved that night, for nobody had such a beautiful dress as I.

In my mother, I observed a woman who has the heart of a servant. She was always doing things for us, for the Church, for family members, for neighbors. She has always been a woman of the Book, studying with commentaries, concordances, correspondence Bible training, and even some random courses at New Brunswick Bible Institute.

I watched her be a single mother for a time, saw her grief at being widowed, observed her frugal life style, loved her creativity, appreciated her hospitality, learned from her work ethic, and admired her gift of being thankful in all circumstances even when they were hard.

Someday my mother will change her address from earth to Heaven. She will see Jesus face to face and she will meet His eyes and hear His voice as He says, "well done, good and faithful servant." I want to hear those words spoken to me. And I want you to hear them spoken to you. Dear ones, nothing this world has to offer can hold a candle to what Jesus has in store for those who love Him! Go, Do, and Be what He  wants for YOU, too. "It will be worth it all when we see Christ."

The Preacher's Son

The Preacher's Son, My Father

February 21, 2012

I haven't seen my father since November 7, 1956 when he arrived home from work. He left the next morning, as usual, before I was up.  He traveled to the Loring Air Base in Limestone and went about his duties making deliveries for O'Donnel's Express. In the afternoon he was working on the restricted area of the base, where he was mortally wounded in an accident with his truck. There were no witnesses. What we know is that he was run over by his own truck, found and taken to the base hospital where he died from the injuries. There was suspicion of foul play, but our mother was never given the results of the investigation that we know occurred. That final story is in God's hands. And while our loss was acute and keenly felt, we also realize that God never makes a mistake. We have rested in that.

Our father didn't have very long to know his own dad, Rev. Clifford Burpee Cain. But I am sure he was much beloved by his preacher dad and prayer warrior. I am sure that his spiritual journey was largely in response to the prayers of his godly father.

Mom says that my father trusted Christ when he was a teenager. I remember how he loved the Word of God. Hearing him read the Bible aloud, while lying on his bed is one of the good memories I have of him. Seeing him and my mother kneeling in prayer, holding hands, and knowing they were praying for their children is a vision that has remained with me to this day.

As a baby and toddler, Paul Clifford Cain was taken to the West Road Church in Monticello. His father was ordained there and only lived until the year after his ordination when he died from tuberculosis of the spine. My grandmother was left as single mom of three children: Dorothy, Geneva, and her little son. Another girl had died as a young child from a "blood disease".

In time, my two aunts married sons of Bill Nason, their own father's dear friend. These two couples: Merle and Dorothy Nason & Vernon and Geneva Nason were godly people who always supported the Church and witnessed faithfully for Christ. They were a great influence on my father and mother, especially since the women were my father's sisters and the men were my mother's uncles!

I do not know how or when it happened, but my grandmother drifted away from her Church life and ended up marrying an unsaved man. They had three daughters, greatly beloved aunts to me: Norma, Barbara, and Ella. After a great number of years, my grandmother's second husband (Grampie Harley Simms) trusted in the Lord Jesus as his savior. My grandmother had returned to her Christian life and faithfully attended the Lake Road Church for worship and prayer services as long as she was physically able.

As a teenager, my father walked to the Pentecostal Church on the Muckatee Road in Monticello, as did some of his friends. It was apostolic in theology and he found it disappointing. It is unclear how frequently he attended Church at that time in his life, but as a young married man he attended the United Baptist Church in Littleton with my mother. After family and friends re-opened the Lake Road Church in Monticello, my Dad became active there as song leader and lay preacher.

Our Dad had memorized lengthy portions from the Bible. I remember when brother Clifford was only two years old and in the high chair, he had learned some passages from our Dad. The one I most remember was John 14:1-6. Dad loved to hear that little boy voice reciting the Word. It was a great joy to him.

My father had a marvelous singing voice, and as I became proficient at the piano he used to like me to play and sing with him. One of his favorites was "Heavenly Sunshine" and another was "The Love of God". My mother had those two songs sung at his funeral on November 11, 1956.

Besides his service at Lake Road, our father served as interim pastor at Plaster Rock and Lerwick, New Brunswick. Mom traveled to those Churches with him and played the organ. I dimly remember some of those trips.

--- This picture is of my father when he was a teenager.